[ No thanks to stifling her feelings, she can't put it into words that stifling her feelings has created more problems than solutions. ]
If I hold back... it makes it worse. I can't have it worse.
[ She hopes that Nikolai understands what she means. ]
... He does. And I know it can be used against me. I just don't want it to get worse. I cannot control it if all I do is bury. There is no middle ground, it's either hunger or feel nothing at all.
no subject
[ No thanks to stifling her feelings, she can't put it into words that stifling her feelings has created more problems than solutions. ]
If I hold back... it makes it worse. I can't have it worse.
[ She hopes that Nikolai understands what she means. ]
... He does. And I know it can be used against me. I just don't want it to get worse. I cannot control it if all I do is bury. There is no middle ground, it's either hunger or feel nothing at all.